EMPATHS: What to do When You Take on the Pain of Others

Screen Shot 2017-10-03 at 2.31.46 PM Those of us who are Empaths take on the pain of those around us.

Our intention is good; we want to help. Our method is flawed; it does not honor nor help others when we take on their pain; it brings pain to our body and mind; they continue to bring pain to themselves.


When we take on another’s pain in an attempt to relieve them of their pain, we are not honoring them or trusting them to be able to find their own healing path. It’s their pain to heal. It’s their path, and their lessons to learn.

When we take on their pain, it disrupts our energy system. It takes us out of balance. It’s not our energy. Yes, we can have compassion for them. Yes, we can wish them healing. No, we cannot heal them by taking on their pain.

In the Full Cleansing Meditation below, you’ll learn how to return the pain to those from whom you took the energy. You’ll learn how to return it with love, honor, and wishes for them to heal…leaving you with your own energy.

Full Cleansing Meditation

Sit with your feet flat on the floor and your back straight. Place your hands on your lap, palms facing up. Close your eyes as you take a deep relaxing breath into your heart.

Take another deep relaxing breath.

With your third deep breath, starting with the tips of your toes, intend that any energy you have taken on from another being begins to form into a ball of energy. Imagine that a ball of energy begins to be formed in each leg. This is the energy of others that you have taken into your energy field. The color of these energy balls will depend upon the energy you have taken on.  Simply notice.

Begin rolling the balls of energy up, starting with your toes, through your feet to your ankles. As the balls travel up your body they become larger. Roll the balls of energy up to your knees with the intention that all the energy you have taken on from others is being gathered into these balls of energy. Allow the balls of energy to continue up to your hips. The two balls of energy merge into one ball. It flows up your trunk. Imagine that two more balls are forming at the tips of your fingers. These balls flow up your arms and meet the other ball at your neck, forming one ball. This ball flows up through your head.

Allow the ball to flow through the top of your head, and then disperse. The energy finds its original source. It knows where it belongs.

As you return the energy, honor it. Honor those from whom you took on the energy. Bless them. Trust them to find their own healing paths. Allow it. Allow it to be easy.

Feel your body. If you have a sense that the cleansing was not complete, repeat the process with the intention that all the energies that you have taken on from others leave your body.

Feel your body. Feel your energy.

Take a deep breath into your heart, and as you exhale allow your body and mind to relax. Take a second deep breath allowing your body and mind to become more and more relaxed. Take a third deep breath and as you exhale, imagine that your body and mind are completely relaxed.

Remind yourself, “I am loving, gentle, kind . . . ” (as many of your Empath qualities as come to you.) Allow yourself to know this state, so you can return to it at any time during your day. Allow yourself to remain in this state as long as is comfortable for you.

Repeat this meditation each night before you go to sleep – allowing all energy that you have taken on from others to be returned to them, whomever they are and wherever they may be, along with your deepest desire for their healing.

Allow it to be easy.
And it is so.

About Connie Russert, M.S.

In 1985 I discovered that I have a gift - the ability to connect with Master Spirit Guides and deliver deeply healing messages and profound spiritual wisdom. I have been honored and privileged to be able to deliver channeling services to spiritual seekers around the globe. I am currently retired from personal channeling and dedicating my time to writing.
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3 Responses to EMPATHS: What to do When You Take on the Pain of Others

  1. Judith Fruge says:

    WOW, Connie, I can’t believe the synchronicity. It’s perfect for what I want to cover in my MBSR class tonight. Thank you!!!

    Love, Judi >

  2. Deena says:

    Always transcendent and healing!! Thank you Connie and Paularyo!

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